TL;DR:This Thursday Thought explores the power of selective hearing in overcoming obstacles and achieving success. I was reminded of it during the latest episode of The Innovation Show when I was interviewed by Scott Wolfson and Kes Sampanthar. I was convinced to write it after I read the fable to my 11-year old son last night and unfortunately he had already experienced it at his young age. Inspired by a fable about a deaf frog who misinterprets discouragement as encouragement, the article delves into personal experiences in sports and corporate life, illustrating how tuning out negativity can lead to remarkable achievements. It also shares the surprising origin story of the first computer display, born from an engineer’s determination to defy orders and push forward against the odds. The key takeaway: success often hinges on ignoring naysayers and staying focused on your vision.
“I have often wondered how it is that every man loves himself more than all the rest of men, but yet sets less value on his own opinion of himself than on the opinion of others.” — Marcus Aurelius
“Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice.”
— Steve Jobs
Before I wrote my book Undisruptable, I drafted an earlier manuscript aimed at budding athletes with a twist—how to stack the odds in your favour even if you’re not naturally talented. One of the key lessons in that book revolved around a timeless Chinese proverb:
“Those that say it can’t be done should get out of the way of those doing it.”
In my experience, the biggest obstacle to success is rarely a lack of talent but rather the voices—external and internal—that discourage us from even trying. Whether you’re starting a new business, learning a skill later in life, or contemplating a career change, the doubters will always be there. The question is: do you choose to listen?
Sometimes, those closest to us discourage us out of fear—fear that we might fail, or worse, that we might succeed and leave them behind. Other times, their words reflect their own unfulfilled dreams and regrets. This article is for anyone facing those voices—whether you’re a founder, a retiree picking up an instrument, or someone standing at the edge of a leap into the unknown.
The following fable perfectly captures the mindset required to overcome these barriers.
The Deaf Frog
A group of frogs were hopping through the forest when two of them fell into a deep pit. The others gathered around and, seeing how deep it was, told them there was no hope of escape. Despite their grim warnings, the two trapped frogs began to jump, determined to find a way out.
The onlookers shouted, insisting that their efforts were pointless, urging them to give up and accept their fate.
Worn down by the negative words, one of the frogs lost heart, gave up, and succumbed. The other, however, kept jumping, even as the crowd implored him to stop. Strangely, their frantic gestures seemed to spur him on, and he jumped with even more determination until, finally, he escaped the pit.
When he emerged, the others asked, “Why did you ignore our warnings?”
The frog smiled and explained that he was deaf—he had mistaken their discouragement for encouragement.
This fable speaks to so many aspects of life. The “deaf frog effect” is something I’ve experienced countless times, especially when choosing paths less travelled. It’s often easier to believe the naysayers than to trust yourself—but breakthroughs only happen when you choose to keep jumping.
My Own Deaf Frog Moments: Playing Rugby in France
When I was 21, I had an opportunity to play professional rugby for a French first division club, Dax. I was studying French in college, and the experience not only deepened my understanding of the language but also significantly improved my game.
But before I even set foot in France, the doubts poured in. Friends thought I should join them in Australia instead. Rugby contacts warned that I’d be out of sight and out of mind in Ireland. My parents worried about my academic and career prospects. These voices almost became louder than my own aspirations.
In 1998, before the days of satellite TV, I knew little about French rugby. This ignorance worked in my favour—I wasn’t intimidated by big-name players or legendary stadiums. Every game felt equally important, and I performed without the burden of preconceived limitations.
The funniest part? When we played in intimidating venues, the fans would bang on hoardings and shout abuse. At the time, with my limited French, just like the deaf frog, I thought they were cheering us on! That innocent misunderstanding shielded me from fear, and I played with a freedom I would later struggle to recapture.
Looking back, I see those early days as a gift—before I internalised too many doubts and self-imposed barriers. My hope is that by sharing this, you’ll recognise and silence those voices holding you back.
The Chuck House Story: When Selective Hearing Sparks Innovation
The deaf frog effect isn’t just a personal phenomenon—it applies in the business world too. A great example is Chuck House, an engineer at Hewlett-Packard (HP) in the 1960s.
House was working on a project to build large-scale electrostatic displays, essentially an early version of a computer monitor. When David Packard, HP’s co-founder, visited House’s lab, he dismissed the project and told him, “I don’t want to see it in this lab when I come back next year.”
Most people would have interpreted this as a clear directive to abandon the work. But House chose a different interpretation—he saw it as a challenge to get the product out of the lab and into production before Packard’s return.
Working in secret and using his holidays, House took a prototype to potential customers and secured orders. When Packard returned and asked what happened, House proudly announced, “You said you didn’t want to see it in the lab. It isn’t. It’s in production.”
That project went on to become HP’s first commercially available computer display.
House’s story perfectly illustrates the power of choosing how you interpret feedback. Sometimes, what sounds like criticism can be reframed as a challenge to prove yourself.
Conclusion: Write Your Own Script
Selective hearing is an invaluable skill. There will always be voices that tell you why you can’t do something. Sometimes, they come from the people closest to you, other times from within your own head.
You are the main character in your own story. If the current cast is full of naysayers, it’s time to rewrite your script.
A final thought for those who hold others back—be mindful of your words. You have the power to either plant doubt or inspire confidence. Will you be the person who builds others up or the one who holds them back?
“Too often, what stops us from attempting more are the artificial barriers we’ve constructed that limit our potential.”
Choose to ignore them.
The latest episode of The Innovation Show is my on the receiving end of some great questions.
https://medium.com/media/08696f9c6b5d5a7ae155369480e46f2e/href
The Deaf Frog Effect: Why Tuning Out Naysayers is Key to Success was originally published in The Thursday Thought on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.
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